lined up right, and when I pushed on the applicator the tampon
rocketed straight between my legs and into the toilet bowl.
The second one went in kind of sideways and not far
enough. I pulled on the string to get it out and wrapped it in
toilet paper before throwing it in the trash. The third one went
in right, it seemed, but it sort of hurt. I told myself that was
probably normal, since I’d never put anything inside my vagina
before. And I wondered if I would be able to tell if I had torn my
hymen with a tampon, since I was bleeding anyway. And then
I wondered if that meant that I wasn’t a virgin anymore, and if
when I had sex someday if the guy would think I was a slut if I
didn’t bleed the first time.
I wish I could have used a pad, but Mom didn’t have any
in her toiletries bag and anyway it was too late now. There was
a tampon in my vagina and I’d finally gotten my period and it
was the middle of the night in Rome.
I went back into the bedroom. I fumbled through my suit-
case for another pair of pajamas. Mom was still asleep. I almost
woke her up to tell her, but at the last minute I didn’t. Instead
I slipped as quietly as I could back into bed, placed my glasses
on the nightstand, and rolled onto my side facing away from
her, pulling the covers up to my chin. Was this it, then? Was I
a woman now?
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